Zero / 0

I haven't found anything perfect on my scorecard yet
that's why I've been quiet lately
Patience being tested
OMG pls help!

Missing

Feeling very uneasy. If I knew that would be the last time I'd give him a hug before I left... If only I knew that's the last time I'd wanna hear him speak for a bit longer. Thinking how imperfect it would be not seeing him in that little house the next time I go back. One thing I'd never failed to do whenever I first stepped into the house - To Greet Him; "Ah Gong, hello".

He's a fortuneteller and I used to see many strangers in the house sitting in the living room waiting to meet him during chinese new year. Remember when I was a little girl neighbours of the other end saw me, she wondered which family I was from I was thinking whether to tell her my full name or... but I go I'm from the 'Ang' family, just few doors next to hers. She then smiled and told me my grandpa's full name. I went to mummy told her what had just happened. She goes ah gong is a very famous fortuneteller, of course people know his full name. Ahhh got it now. Since then I always describe him as 'the popular fortuneteller, and and, he's my grandpa'.

I like my chinese name cause it's given by him. It means a lot to me; every word has a meaning, perfectly defined by him. Used to ask him for some tips getting straight A(s) in exams when I was young lol but he always goes getting A in exams doesn't mean anything to you, ur meant for sth greater in life. Often there's some kinda communication barrier between us, wish I could speak better Hokkien, wish I got to know him better too...

Wondered he'd ever thought of me for a second before he left... been asking mummy about this cause I really wanted to know. Mummy said we shouldn't worry about this now and be happy for him that he left peacefully. True. Burst into tears when papa broke the news to me. couldn't believe that just happened; I wasn't there in the funeral, I wasn't there to cheer mummy up; I could only imagine - who what when where how!

Everything seemed too late now. I wish I had a time machine DOINK. If I had a chance to say one more thing to him, I would say thank you - you did make us so proud and I'm happy for you're my ah gong.

Sweet!

u're getting ur result tomorrow then?

yea...

you think you did alright?

not sure... or maybe not

It's okay if you failed, we will see what we could do...
you can either stay to complete it or come home for good
u don't worry so much

*speechless*
*touched*
okay. will let you know tomorrow what I get

Sweet! My papa
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We're happy after all. Mummy's been funny tho lol. as usual she never seemed to care much about results and in fact, she's a bit down tho cause passing grades means I might not go home for good any time soon lol

She goes "I thought you told us you'd most likely to fail your degree" and I go "so you rather I fail the whole thing and come home for good?" She's the coolest mum ever lol

21

Is being 21 a difficult thing? Is being 21 different than being 20? My love-being-18 thinking has never changed tho... I still wish I was 18, always lol =p

Didn't have lots to do for bday this year (as usual). Birmingham was alright, especially loving the HBK - Hot Birmingham Kids (hope I got this right lol), located in Perry Barr hahahaha. And of course, my favourite Glasgow!

First stop: Birmingham

Yummy Steamboat!!!

Second Stop: Glasgow

"I want oreo cheesecake for bday"
"So bossy. lol"


Home-made Oreo Cheesecake!
cheng cheng cheng...

Cute Bday Card lol

Best costume of Halloween 2008
but it's sooooo chinese!!! lol

Not The Same

Nothing feels the same. Just not the same. To name a few significant differences between things? Oh no I really don't have the 'balls' to do so now. No Guts No Glory!!! What a loser! Boo.

Better in Time. Hopefully

Its been the longest winter without you
I didnt know where to turn to
See somehow I cant forget you
After all that we've been through

thinking that u deserved it
now i realize that i really didnt know
I didnt notice, you mean everything
quickly im learning, to love again
all i know is, imma be ok

thought i could live without you
its gonna hurt when it heals to
it'll all get better in time
eventhough i really loved you
ur gonna smile cause u deserve to
it'll all get better in time

was it all that easy
to just put aside my feelings

if im dreaming
dont wanna let, hurt ur feelings

but thats the path, i believe in
and i know that, time will heal it
I didnt notice, you mean everything
quickly im learning, to love again
all i know is, imma be ok

thought i could live without you
its gonna hurt when it heals to
it'll all get better in time
eventhough i really loved you
ur gonna smile cause u deserve to
it'll all get better in time

since theres no more you and me
its time i let you go so u can be free
and live ur life how it should be
no matter how hard it is u'll be fine without me

thought i could live without you
its gonna hurt when it heals to
it'll all get better in time
eventhough i really loved you
ur gonna smile cause u deserve to
it'll all get better in time

Overall updates; anything else?

Hello updates updates!!! Feeling abit strange, haven't been in this place for a long time now... where should I start? Aaaaa... let's mark my one-year anniversary of my stay in London. Still not liking it after a year tho lol. Wanting a change ... move to a better place?! lol Desperately needing a new job now!!! I couldn't sleep at nights thinking I'm actually jobless now =( New flat's pretty cool and I kinda like it for myself (Not Cheehow tho lol).Friendly 24-7 concierge, cool facilities, strategic location and bigger room for me too =p

tiny living room lol

weili's bedroom =)

MGH!!! *my bitch* lol

tiny-practical kitchen, Not!

Execellent views of the "London Eye" from flat

Recommended by Chef Koh lol

All girls are welcomed regardless of age or background
Cheehow: Love is compromise (hahahaha)

Missing home! wanna go home. There isn't a night goes by that I don't miss home. I definitely hope to spend some time with pa & mummy & my dogs. Seems like sth's got to be sacrificed when there's other potential new option available in life. Choices do sometimes give my life the spark I am looking for, but I'm not really willing to sacrifice. I wish I had a mirror that reflects my future self. There's no turning back in every move I'm going to take I'm so afraid of failure I don't see myself having any room to make mistakes in life. I've been telling myself I do have the time to allow myself to make mistakes. It sounds real silly but sometimes things do happen!

Glasgow: my new second home lol is a better place to live in every way except one... emm marketing job opportunities are fairly limited =(

My rolls!

His rolls!

Who made better sushi rolls?
Absolutely ME! lol